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I was watching TV one day and
I was simply struck with dissapointment at the huge lack of reality
TV out there.I mean afterall,these shows are like some kind of crack
they're so damned good.Than I thought it'd be a really great idea for
me to come up with my own,really cool reality show all about the making
of a show.I know you're thinking you've already seen it before,but you're
nothing special so you probably haven't.So,with that in mind here is
my pitch to all the major networks for a TV idea.
The show starts off with me,that's
going to get all the ratings right there.Than I introduce myself as
if there was some need to because everyone knows what I look like.After
I do that some strange voice will describe the show and how it works.Than
all these people will be sending in video tapes that will be shown on
the air as people will try to explain why they should be on my show.After
this I tell the people that the show they'll be making is going to be
all about how I am the funniest man on the internet today.Once I shock
them with this statement I'll bring in the people and ask them a few
questions on how they plan on doing a show.After that comes a chance
for me to tell them how I felt they did.Only it's not going to be like
that jackass Simon Gowell,he's a pansey.Instead of me complaining on
and on and on like some kind of middle aged woman during her period
I'm going to have them stand on a drop door.Than when they say shit
I don't like I'll tell them they suck and drop their asses to a hard
wood floor under the stage. Once the people are selected there won't
be any stupid assed mini games that will determine who is going to win.No,instead
I'll be there getting my ass kissed by everyone involved on the project.The
eliminations will be based on who kisses my ass the least in that week,or
the woman who I feel gives the shittiest blowjobs.Afterall,if I'm going
to have my ass kissed it's going to be by a bunch of hot bitches,that
will bring in even more ratings right there.Once I narrow everything
down to the final bitch,she will get the ultimate grand prize,a chance
to get down with the greatness,produce a show about how great I am,
and did I mention she'll get down with the greatness.In fact I think
I'm going to create myself a sign up sheet that will allow bitches to
sign up right now.Just copy and paste the form below into an email and
finish filling it out.Send it to my address theepiczone@gmail.com and
I'll probably deny you because no hot bitches come to my site,only lonely
computer geeks that look up to me because I'm funny.Either way,here's
the list.Send it along with a picture to the already mentioned e-mail.
Name:
Age:
Sex(Circle one):Female Female Female
Occupation:
Favorite Man:
100 word essay on how the Epic owns:
Send this to the email along
with a picture,thanks for taking part in this great show.I forgot to
name it so I think I'll call it,"The Epic Is My Hero."Thanks
for your support.This show will be picked up in about 2 hours by one
of the major networks.Probably Fox though since they've gone so far
downhill as of late.
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