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Suppose you've just called up your friend for a guys night out on the
town. It's been a long time since you have spent time with your friend.
After calling his phone a couple times you get no answer. Giving up
on your guys night out you resort to the cheapest porno you can find
on PPV and spend the night jacking off to skin flicks. After falling
aspleep with your dick in your hand and the tv still on you wake up
to the ringing of your cell phone. It's your friend who apologizes for
not picking up your calls. When you ask him where he was he responds,
"Me and the woman went out to dinner last night. Sorry man."
Does this sound like something that has happened to you? It probably
has in some way shape or form, at least the skin flicks part has probably
happend to you. Either way, this is a sure sign that your friend is
whipped by the pussy. Being whipped by a pussy is a new thing in the
era of man. There were never any cave men that wouldn't go out with
the guys to club some shit because his woman wanted to spend more time
together, there was never a pirate that would opt to stay home with
his wife instead of ruining peoples shit out at sea, and there most
certainly was never a roman gladiator that would take his woman to dinner
instead of kicking a lion right in the teeth in the middle of a packed
collesium. It seems only recently that men are going above and beyond
to score some off of their women. It's a sad sign in the history of
man when two guys can't even spend a night out looking at other women
in tight shirts without hearing about it the next day.In case you're
unfamiliar being whipped, here are some things to look out for:
When looking for a whipped friend watch out for a change in appearance.
Perhaps your friend who would never be caught in some pussy ass clothing
may be changing his mind and trying out new things. Maybe he has gotten
a new hair style that just doesn't appear as manly as before and if
he had a beard he may have also shaved it. I once had a friend that
was an extreme hick. He would wear nothing, but shirts for hunting,
fishing, and any of the above. So after about 8 or so months with his
girlfriend I started to notice a change. He had some of the gayest shirts
known to mankind. Luckily he broke up with the bitch and no longer wears
pink shirts with green and blue stripes through them. Ew, that's nasty
looking.
Friends taste in music may also be hampered by the power of a womens
lower hole. If you see a friend who listens to heavy metal start going
soft on you than it's a sure sign of whippage. Anytime someone starts
listening to Elton John and watching Oprah you can be sure that there
is some female influence in the mix. Maybe the most obvious sign that
your friend is whipped is a complete lack of appearance at all. Your
phone calls are never answered, you never get a return call, and all
of the things you used to do are no longer going on. It's almost as
if you've lost a friend temporaily. I've sadly seen it happen from time
to time, it's like the movie Saving Silverman only in real life and
without the kidnapping part.
There are things you can do however, you could make a few bold and
brave attempts to save your friend from the ball and chain as it's known
today. You could plant pictures of him and other women in her mailbox,
but you would have to be pretty good at Photoshop. Another solution
is to kick your friend in the head and tell him to stop putting the
pussy on the pedistal, a la the 40 Year Old Virgin. If you're a patient
person like me you could wait it out so your friend would get dicked
over like he deserves for dicking you over. However the most extreme
and quickest answer would be to kill the bitch. Although I didn't tell
you to do that.
Well I hope this guide has provided some small form of help to you
in identifiing a whipped friend who is in need of help. Now use your
newly gained knowledge to help regain your friends from the old ball
and chains of todays society.
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